.Editor's Keep in mind: The observing is the text of a character from Trip 3 Commander Frank L. Culbertson (Captain, USN Resigned), assessing the occasions of September 11.September 12, 2001 7:34 p.m.I haven't written significantly concerning specifics of the mission during the course of the month I have actually been actually right here, mostly for pair of explanations: the initial being that there has actually been incredibly little bit of time to accomplish that kind of writing, and also secondly since I am actually unsure how comfortable I am actually sharing notions I show to friends and family with the rest of the world.Well, undoubtedly the world altered today. What I say or do is actually quite minor compared to the implication of what occurred to our country today when it was struck through ... through whom? Terrorists is all we know, I think. Difficult to know at whom to route our anger and fear ...I had actually merely completed a lot of activities today, one of the most time-consuming being actually the physical exams of all workers participants. In a personal talk complying with that, the flight cosmetic surgeon told me they were possessing a quite poor time on the ground. I possessed no suggestion ...He explained the circumstance to me as greatest he recognized it at ~ 0900 CDT. I was actually made speechless, at that point terrified. My 1st thought was actually that this wasn't a real chat, that I was still paying attention to one of my Tom Clancy strips. It simply failed to appear achievable on this scale in our nation. I could not also envision the details, even before the updates of additional damage started can be found in.Vladimir came by rather promptly, picking up that something quite severe was being discussed. I swung Michael in to the component too. They were actually also surprised and stunned. After our company signed off, I tried to detail to Vladimir and also Michael as absolute best I could possibly the prospective magnitude of this particular act of horror in downtown New york and at the Pentagon. They precisely recognized and also were actually incredibly thoughtful.I eyed the World Chart on the computer system to find where over the globe we were actually and observed that we were actually coming southeast out of Canada as well as would be actually skipping New England in a handful of minutes. I zoomed around the terminal till I found a home window that would certainly provide me a scenery of NYC and grabbed the closest camera. It took place to be a camera, and also I was appearing south from the window of Michael's log cabin.The smoke cigarettes appeared to have a strange flower to it at the bottom of the column that was actually streaming south of the metropolitan area. After going through among the newspaper article our team only received, I think our team were actually looking at NY around the time of, or even shortly after, the failure of the second high rise. Just how horrible ...I panned the camera all along the East Coastline to the south to observe if I could observe any other smoke around Washington, or anywhere else, yet absolutely nothing showed up.It was actually fairly difficult to think about work afterwards, though our team possessed some to accomplish, however on the upcoming track our company moved across the United States further southern. All 3 of us were functioning one or two video cameras to attempt to get scenery of Nyc or even Washington. There was actually haze over Washington, yet no specific source could be viewed. Everything appeared incredible coming from two to three hundred miles away. I can't picture the terrible settings on the ground.Other than the emotional impact of our nation being actually attacked as well as countless our consumers and maybe some buddies being gotten rid of, the most mind-boggling sensation being actually where I am actually is one of seclusion.Following time ... I guess the fatigue and also psychological stress received the most ideal of me. I couldn't remain awake and also continue to compose. Today was still difficult, yet our experts began obtaining even more relevant information, plus our company possessed the honor of talking directly with the Facility Supervisor, Roy Estess, that assured our team that the ground teams would certainly continue to operate and ensure our security, and also the safe operation of the Place. Our team also learnt through our Supervisor, Mr. Goldin, that included that the companions in the Program are actually all absolutely devoted to proceeding risk-free functions and also assistance. These were never ever inquiries for me. I recognize all these people! The ground teams have been incredibly encouraging, quite understanding of the impact of the updates, and have tried to become as beneficial as possible. They have actually all been incredibly specialist and centered though I can't picture the diversion of this sort of headlines can be found in and the notion that government properties might be at risk. They never ever bypassed a beat, also when relocating nerve center. And also a group of senior personnel and friends provided our company a pretty extensive instruction about what was actually recognized and what was actually being performed in the government and also at NASA on Tuesday afternoon, which was quite valuable and also sort of them to perform in the midst of all the turmoil. The Russian TsUP has additionally been actually supportive as well as valuable, trying to uplink news articles when our personal possessions were unusable, and saying kind words ...My crewmates have actually been actually wonderful, also. They know it is actually been a difficult day for me and the folks on the ground, as well as they've made an effort to become as also keeled as well as useful as feasible. Michael even corrected me my beloved Borscht soup for dinner. And they offer me plenty of room to believe when I needed it. They are extremely compassionate and certainly shocked at whoever will perform this.I understand plenty of individuals in Washington, numerous folks who journey to DC and New York City, numerous that are actually flies, that I really felt certain I would certainly acquire at least a couple of pieces of problem over the upcoming handful of days. I obtained the initial one today when I knew that the Captain of the American Airlines plane that reached the Pentagon was actually Chic Burlingame, a classmate of mine. I encountered Chic during the course of plebe summer when we remained in the D&B together, as well as our company possessed lots of training class with each other. I can not picture what he must of undergone, and currently I listen to that he may have increased even further than our experts may also think of by probably avoiding his plane coming from being the one to tackle the White Home. What a dreadful loss, however I make sure Chic was combating bravely throughout. And tears do not move the same precede ...It's challenging to define exactly how it really feels to become the only American fully off the planet at once such as this. The emotion that I should exist with each of you, coping with this, aiding somehow, is actually overwhelming. I recognize that our team perform the limit (or past) of a horrible change in the history of the planet. A lot of traits are going to never coincide again after September 11, 2001. Certainly not simply for the 1000s and also hundreds of folks directly had an effect on by these horrendous actions of terrorism, but probably for we all. Our experts will discover ourselves really feeling in a different way concerning loads of things, including probably room expedition, unfortunately.It is actually unpleasant to see smoke cigarettes pouring coming from cuts in your own nation from such an excellent angle. The duality of being on a spacecraft committed to strengthening life on the planet and also watching life being damaged through such planned, horrendous actions is actually jolting to the mind, no matter that you are. As well as the understanding that everything will be various than when we introduced by the time our company land is actually a little bit of disconcerting. I believe in our country as well as in our leadership that we are going to carry out every little thing achievable to far better safeguard her and also our loved ones, as well as to deliver justice wherefore has actually been carried out. I have assurance that the great folks at NASA will certainly perform everything required to proceed our objective properly and return our team safely at the right time. And I overlook each one of you very much. I can't exist along with you personally, and we possess a long way to head to complete our mission, but be specific that my soul is along with you, and also understand you remain in my prayers.Humbly, Frank.September 14, 2001 10:49 p.m. An update to the last letter ... Luckily, it's been a hectic full week up right here. And to confirm that, like our nation, our experts are continuing on our intended pathway with company as usual (as high as achievable). Tonight the most recent add-on to the place, the Russian Docking Area will definitely be actually introduced from Baikonur, Kazakhstan. On Saturday evening (United States time), it will dock with us, at a port certainly never utilized before on the low point edge of the Company Element. This new component will certainly provide us one more spot to dock an Improvement or even Soyuz and will supply a sizable airlock along with 2 useable hatches for performing EVA's in Russian Orlan suits, which our company will definitely carry out a few of just before we get back.The concern prior to in taking care of this week was actually insufficient updates. The concern now is actually too much. It arrived simultaneously when e-mail was actually recovered, and also there is actually insufficient opportunity to review it all! Plus it's too challenging to deal with all of it simultaneously. However I cherish receiving it, and also I really appreciate the terrific characters of assistance and also relationship I am acquiring.We are actually doing well aboard, obtaining our job carried out, as well as referring to things. Final evening we possessed a lengthy conversation over dinner concerning the significance of these events, the achievable actions to follow, and what must be actually done. After dinner, Michael resolved telling me that every email he received from buddies in Russia claimed especially to inform me just how regretful they were actually that this taken place, expanding their condolences, and talking to exactly how I was actually carrying out. Vladimir showed me the Russian term for "acknowledgements" after speaking to the previous CDR, Yuri Usachev, on the phone in Superstar Area. (Both the Russian and also the English terms are actually considerably very long to pronounce conveniently.) Really kind people.For the last two times, the Russian MCC has sufficed to transmit live broadcasts of radio updates about the occasion as well as affiliated tales, to see to it I was well updated. Every specialist that has actually come on the line to review a technique or even a complication contends some factor extended hellos to me along with kind terms. Tonight the Russian capcom told us that as a result of the big day of recognition in the US, all the time people had been actually carrying flowers and also edging all the walls of the US consulate in Moscow, and also this evening they were actually lighting candles in the road outside the consulate. How the planet has changed.Folks anywhere appear to realize the senselessness and scary in this assault. As well as the incredible loss. Moscow has taken care of these kind of issues in the last handful of years with condo and subway bombings, so they are as restless to get rid of this hazard as we are. But all-time low series is actually that there are really good people almost everywhere that want to reside in calmness. I read that a kid inquired, "America is so really good to various other countries, we regularly aid everybody, just how can they detest us a great deal?".I hope the instance of cooperation and rely on that this spacecraft and all the people in the course illustrate daily will at some point influence the rest of the globe to work similarly. They must!Regrettably, our experts won't be taking flight over the United States while folks are igniting candle lights. Do not recognize if we could possibly observe that anyhow. Our experts did, however, see a very unusual and also lovely view a handful of minutes ago: the launch of our Docking Compartment on a Soyuz enhancer. Our experts were surpassing it as well as it emerged concerning 3 mins after its launch from Baikonur as the sunlight struck our station, so it was still unaware. It appeared like a big comet with a straight, vast rear silhouetted against the black earth beneath. Despite some bad lighting for a while as the sunlight attacked our window at a low angle, I dealt with some online video of it as to begin with we passed the rocket, and afterwards saw it start to mesmerize as it got elevation and also velocity. I recorded till principal engine cutoff as well as enhancer separation occurred just as our experts moved toward dawn on the Himalayas. An unforgettable attraction in an extraordinary full week ...Life takes place, also precede. Our team're listed below to keep ... Frank.